I remember now why I hated/loved grad school

"So the body implies a next step of speech or action or knowledge or feeling. That word 'implies' is important to me. Suppose though that I didn't say the body implies the next step. Suppose I said the body is pregnant with the next step. You would say, 'Yes, I understand." Suppose I said the body loves the next step. You would say, 'All right, you can say that.' Suppose I say the body cooks the next step; bakes the next step; lacks the next step, or holds it breath longing for the next step. By this time you would know what I am saying, even if I use no word at all but just write that the body ....s the next step. In that blank, my word "implying" says and is the intricacy which is greater than the scheme that any one of the possible words brings with it....

"Language is implicit in the body. The body knows language....

"But a felt sense comes. And when we have a point to make, words come. You know how words come? We open our mouths and expect. Really, and if they don't come, there is nothing much we can do except try again. This coming is characteristic of the body. What else comes like that? Sleep comes like that, and appetites. If they don't come, you just have to wait. We all know that. Tears come like that, and orgasm. Emotions come like that, and so also this felt sense, which is wider and first not clear, comes like that. Then steps come from that felt sense, and they can be quite new steps, and often more intricate than any common concept or distinction."

Eugene T. Gendlin, from "The Wider Role of Bodily Sense in Thought and Language" in Giving the Body Its Due.

Prufrock is in the hizouse!

"I have heard the mermaids singing
each to each

I do not think they will sing to me"

"The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think."

Horace Walpole

When graphic designers attack...

My new favorite website - The iStock Photo Steel Cage. Where graphic designers fight to the death, armed only with their mad Photoshop skills. Image by Uniball, from battle with Mevans.

Nest building

Smoking a cigarette and drinking coffee in the courtyard at work. All the lady birds are gathering nest materials, flying around with sticks in their beaks.

Sometimes I help them, breaking off yielding stems and leaving them in a pile. I like the days when the pile is gone when I come back.

potential

I think I was in love with your potential.

Real or imagined

It's a metaphor for something, yo

Why is my bed only a haven of deliciousness when I have to be at work at 8am? Monday through Friday, my bed is dreamy, delectable, rich. The sheets are fiercely soft and warm, my blankets remind me of the sea and sky. I feel all tender and loving towards my cat pressed against my shoulder, kneading the pillow, mewing in her throat. I hit snooze for an hour because I can't tear myself away from the exquisiteness of it all.

But on the weekends, when I can lay in bed all damn day if I want to, my bed is just not that interesting. My cat is annoying. I can't remember why I love my bed so much. Even though I desperately try to re-create the feeling of exquisiteness, it doesn't come.

It's a metaphor for something.

In case you haven't come across this before...

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you... And as we let our own light shine, we subconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

Marianne Williamson and/or Nelson Mandela

We sleep in nests, people

One time I was talking with someone about how apes build nests to sleep in. They gather together some nice looking leaves, lay them down, and then sleep on them. It seems a little strange when you think about it. But it really is not that different from birds sleeping in nests. Which is when I realized that birds' nests are really just beds.

Which is when I realized that human beings sleep in nests. Because beds are really just nests.

Which made me happy.

Which is when I realized I'm a dork

"Our primary relationship with language is not with its literal meaning, but rather with its emotional texture. As young children we were sensitive to this emotional texture long before we had begun to master the actual meaning of words."

From A Practical Guide to Buddhist Meditation

Yeah

To those who were there along the way. And to Elliott. And you.

"What I used to be will pass away
And then you'll see
That all I want now is happiness
For you and me
What I used to be will pass away
And then you'll see
That all I want now is happiness
For you and me
What I used to be will pass away
And then you'll see
That all I want now is happiness
For you and me
All I want now is happiness
For you and me"

It's prettier with the music.

I have no idea how to even begin to make sense of this.

"For every older brother a man has, his chances of being gay increase by one third." But, this is only true if the man is right-handed.

The world? Still strange. In case you lost track.

Loki, you bitch.

I know you're up to something.

This explains my mid-twenties. (Thanks, Chris, for getting me through them, you magnificent bastard)

"The human shape is a ghost
made of distraction and pain.
Sometimes pure light, sometimes cruel,
trying wildly to open,
this image tightly held within itself."
Rumi

I learn something new every day

Did you know there is something known as brain sand? Brain sand! It is not as silly as its name - it's just calcium and magnesium matter found in the pineal gland. But still...brain sand, brainsand, brains and.

Also, the pineal gland really is related to the third eye. "In some reptiles this pineal eye is an almost fully-developed eye with lens, vitreous humor, and retina."

The world? Still strange. In case you lost track.

Mmm...brain sand.